Gates

And just like that, the gate opens. You writers out there probably know what I mean. Last night was the first night in a while that I reached my daily writing goal (and passed it). I’m not going to lie to you. For the past month and a half, I’ve been struggling. I got lost right around the 100k mark for Son of the Mourning, book 2 in the Absolution of the Morning Star series. I wouldn’t say it was writer’s block, as I was still producing, but it was close. But last night, for no apparent reason, the door opened, the blockage cleared, and I was able to move forward into paradise.

It probably was a mixture of stress at work, turning 40 (and all the crap that comes with that milestone), and trying to formulate a fictional religion of substance that ties into what I already wrote in Dawn of the Lightbearer. As I discussed here and here, this led to a long detour and getting lost researching the transition from a multi-god religion to a single god religion in the bronze age city-states of Canaan. Their religion, which was the spark of Judaism, is not the religion in Son of the Mourning but forms the base much as it’s the foundation of all Abrahamic religions. From this point, many “divine” inspirations led to various tangents, and although mine is fictitious, it is a plausible course. It is called the Caspian Faith, named after its Prophet, and at its center is an event called the Great Beholding. It even has a cross as its symbol, albeit with much different symbolism. Its story, and the world it created, forms the base of the Absolution of the Morning Star Series, so spending some time to get it right is justifiable.

But creating a religion is complicated (duh), and I don’t take it lightly. Most beliefs develop over hundreds if not thousands of years. They also have complex philosophical underpinnings, and I’m no philosopher. What is the difference between the body, soul, spirit, and grace, for example? Why is that important? These are questions people who are more intelligent than I have pontificated over since the dawn of time. I am not a faithful man by nature, and thus I need reasons, even if fantastical. I cannot just accept these things on faith alone. Thus, the dive into history.

Because my antagonists are the Nephilim mentioned in Genesis- or as the bible describes them, the giants produced by the sons of God and the daughters of men, I need to understand some of the story and the potential reasons the bible goes out of its way to mention them. The problem is, after thousands of years of debate, we still don’t know what the bible was trying to say here. Sure, this ambiguity allows the imagination to thrive, and I’ve created creatures that are tortured and looking for purpose- ripe material for a good villain. However, it also meant I had to travel down multiple rabbit holes to get to a plausible explanation of their creation, their appearance, and their motives. Now that is done, I have to weave it into my story.

But the Nephilim are not the only ones in my books that are tortured and looking for purpose. Nothing describes the human-animal better, and in this, my main characters are much like the Nephilim, making the struggle of both relatable. And, as I slaved over this book for the last month and a half, I can certainly resonate with tortured and looking for purpose. But I think I found my way for the time being, and once again, the words are flowing.

As I grow older, my grandfather’s favorite saying keeps coming to mind, “This too shall pass,” and it did. I need to remember that no matter how difficult the locks on these gates are, they are meant to open. With enough picking and tinkering, they’ll click and unveil their path.

Cheers!